Faces pass by, masks pass by and at times I never know if it is the face that I see or if it is a mask. If it is through a mask am I seeing or without one. The border between dreams and reality begins to merge. People laugh at me and I return those laughs like a mad man. Mind wanders into places that I myself would not dare to go. It creates pictures of such intensity, cruelty and rawness as though created from the smokes of Hell's fire.
The realization that no love is selfless mocks at my eternally romantic heart. The different meanings that creep into my mind for the words 'relation','love', 'life' bring out a completely new world. A world where you are alone even when you are amongst the people that want you, that care for you. Life begins to trend to meaningless and there is only one thing that keeps me away from going insane. I do not know what it is. I became an automaton. The boundaries between past, present and future began to erase, passing like sands from one dune into another.
You watch a movie and you know that the hero kicking some badasses, dancing with some girl is just fake. I feel the same about this world and its daily goings. Everything seems just fake and nothing seems real. I don't know why I too embrace this artificiality? Is this the proverbial 'maya'? If yes, how come an idiot like me is able to identify 'maya'? May be even my realization and point of view is also 'maya'.
Scenarios in life create relations, relations churn love, love creates bondings. Bondings create bindings.
Binds in telugu are called 'పాశములు'.
పాశముల చేత బంధింప బడేది పశువు.మనిషి కూడా ఒక పశువే. కాకపొతే జ్ఞానమున్న పశువు. యెంత జ్ఞానముంది అంటే తన పాశాలని తానే తయారు చేసుకునే అంత. ఆ పాశాలే తన లోకం అని, అవి శాశ్వతమని భావించి, వాటిలోనే జీవించి, క్రీడించి, మరణిస్తాడు.
The realization that no love is selfless mocks at my eternally romantic heart. The different meanings that creep into my mind for the words 'relation','love', 'life' bring out a completely new world. A world where you are alone even when you are amongst the people that want you, that care for you. Life begins to trend to meaningless and there is only one thing that keeps me away from going insane. I do not know what it is. I became an automaton. The boundaries between past, present and future began to erase, passing like sands from one dune into another.
You watch a movie and you know that the hero kicking some badasses, dancing with some girl is just fake. I feel the same about this world and its daily goings. Everything seems just fake and nothing seems real. I don't know why I too embrace this artificiality? Is this the proverbial 'maya'? If yes, how come an idiot like me is able to identify 'maya'? May be even my realization and point of view is also 'maya'.
Scenarios in life create relations, relations churn love, love creates bondings. Bondings create bindings.
Binds in telugu are called 'పాశములు'.
పాశముల చేత బంధింప బడేది పశువు.మనిషి కూడా ఒక పశువే. కాకపొతే జ్ఞానమున్న పశువు. యెంత జ్ఞానముంది అంటే తన పాశాలని తానే తయారు చేసుకునే అంత. ఆ పాశాలే తన లోకం అని, అవి శాశ్వతమని భావించి, వాటిలోనే జీవించి, క్రీడించి, మరణిస్తాడు.
"అంతా మట్టేనని తెలుసు
అదీ ఒక మాయే అని తెలుసు"మూడు యాభైలు ఎవరు బతకరు. కన్ను తెరిస్తే జననం, కన్ను మూస్తే మరణం, రెప్పతాఉ కాలం ఈ వెదవ జీవితం అన్నారు ఎవరో. ఆ మాత్రం జీవితానికే కక్షలు, కార్పణ్యాలు, ప్రేమలు, అభిమానాలు, బంధాలు, అనుబంధాలు, ఆస్తులు, అంతస్తులు, అస్మదీయులు, తస్మదీయులు. మనకి ఉన్నంత అతిశయోక్తి గోడల మీద బతికే బల్లికి, గోడల మీద పాకే నాచుకి కూడా ఉంటుంది. వాటి జీవితాలకి, మన జీవితాలకి పెద్ద తేడా లేదు ఒక్క జీవిత కాలం తప్ప.
Still I continue to embrace what I see in this world as 'reality', getting ready to fall into the trap. Call it simple ignorance or 'maaya'. The Illusion called Life. At the end of the day, I too am a normal human being, homo sapiens governed and controlled by the same brutal, bestial powers and desires of body and mind, that were present since life started on Earth. I am, so I live.
Still I continue to embrace what I see in this world as 'reality', getting ready to fall into the trap. Call it simple ignorance or 'maaya'. The Illusion called Life. At the end of the day, I too am a normal human being, homo sapiens governed and controlled by the same brutal, bestial powers and desires of body and mind, that were present since life started on Earth. I am, so I live.
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